feeling a little out of sorts. not sure why. maybe it is just the knowledge that my kids are growing up, or that i am growing up. seems like i still look at myself as that kid in college. you know, the one who made midnight runs to taco bell with change we found in the couch cushions of the dorm lounge. the one who went to baseball games, to watch that amazing man i never thought i deserved. the one who would stay on the phone all night with that same guy only because no one wanted to be the first one to hang up. where did the time go? as time goes by, does the self image change? in ten more years will i see myself as a thirty two year old mother of five little people in iowa? or will i still be that college girl? maybe i just need a little super hero thing going on. in light of my recent discovery of my super hero name, maybe i need to put it to use. for the next couple of days, i am no longer going to be amy smith. please refer to me as:
Olive Lemon Drop.
okay, just realized those initials. great.
May 31, 2007 at 6:43 pm
You’re crackin’ me up, Olive!
June 4, 2007 at 8:48 am
I’ve found that I’m all those things all at once — college boy, hurt little kid, reasonably competent adult, father. It can get a little confusing if you don’t take the time to meditate on your life and get everything straight. I used to be really fascinated by the power that memories have on people — the way Janece’s dad said that listening to ’50s music made him feel like he was 17 again or the way that old veterans shed a tear when thinking about comrades killed in wars that were decades ago. But the older I get, the more I understand it.